It's Mom's Day! White Rose for Mama

White Rose for Mama

Putih.

The pearly white petals with soothing scent

The unseen presence felt

Creeping up every corners of my heart

Putih

The pure classy queen

Of  a chosen king

Not to rule but already win

all the prince and princess to cling

Putih, the White Rose, made heads turn

Protected, not allowed to be taunted 

Appeared sweet,yet significant 

As it is always remembered 

Come another year with no white roses for mama

Nor will she get a wish from a card

Because she is forever 'the' white rose 

Forever bloomed in the garden of my heart 

                                                                              My Kristal Crib    May 11, 2013

Life Pleasure

I ve been a mom for almost 18 years. But still, struggling to be the best. I am not going to talk about my motherhood experiences as I can't be certain that my record book can match the the two ladies in the picture. 

I will only focus on my mom - Hjh Hamidah Abdullah, not many knew her as, Si 'Putih',  born on Nov 25th, 1945 and left us August 27th 1999. The one lady that I have adored (and will forever adore) so much for every reasons available on earth. Among the greatest life pleasure Allah have granted me, an honor to spend those moment with someone with such loving and nurturing character. 

Spending those years with her growing up with her in the background, no  matter where I was, I felt very close. The frequent chats on the phone made me feel she was with me all the time. The one person I turned to, the one who kept track of my daily routine. Who could tell when I am happy or sad, worry or unsure. Who made good predictions of how I feel about things. Sometime, I didn't have to tell, the magic in her, she could guess I need her for comfort. She made thing feel good. And I obliged to make her feel good when things were not going our way too. I was always on standby mode to protect her when she was vulnerable. I would go all out to defend her and protect her from anything. I guess, that is how I acquired the resiliency to fight back.

I was so blessed to have her for 31 years. It has not been easy to live without her around. But her spirit is with me inside me. Very often when things were rough, I wish I could just reach for the phone and call her for comfort as I used to. To hear her voice to calm me down, taking away all the pain, difficulties and the complexity of how life can be.    

I miss coming home on Friday and spend the whole weekend with her doing nothing but chatting especially on her bed or out tea time together at the porch. I never felt the distance where ever I was, as she would call me to update things, to ask for my opinions on anything. I felt very much appreciated by mom even though I know I was way too young and inexperienced to give my opinions and had my views accepted. I miss you mom so badly that I dont know how to describe.

On a different note, my mother-in-law, whom I got to know for the last 19 years - is also a reward from Allah for such a simple down-to-earth person. She is not a replacement of my mom but an addition to me in my family life. 

Happy Mom's day to 2 most wonderful moms on earth. Both with loving and nurturing qualities that I can never match. Hjh Hamidah Abdullah, the one who raised and taught me the meanings of growing up from a child to a daughter to being a mother to my children. Muga Bonda tenang disana. AL fatihah. Another one, Hjh Zaiton Idris, my MiL, for accepting me to be part of her family and continue become wonderful grandmother to my children. May Allah keep showering you with good health, longevity and wellness.